December 1, 2009
It is the day we used to open the first door of our Advent calendars, when there were children in the house. In our part of Pennsylvania, it is more noteworthy to many locals that it is the second day of deer rifle hunting season. I will have to be careful walking in our woods again, and will very likely have to chase hunters out of our back yard. I am not a hunter — I still hear Bambi’s mother saying, “Run! Run as fast as you can! And whatever you do, keep running, and don’t look back!” It is one of the random things stuck in my memory, like a drinking toast from Goethe’s Faust, some e.e.cummings poetry, portions of Romeo and Juliet, and the Jabberwocky. I remember my cousin, Jody, sitting in front of our record player, listening to Bambi, sobbing. She grew up to be a hunter, though. If you celebrate Christmas, Happy Advent. If you are a deer hunter, stay out of our woods!
We learned yesterday that the doctor Tim would like to see, at Johns Hopkins, refused to see him, because his PSA is too high. I guess he thinks that he can’t do anything for him, or something, and that might impact his cure track record. Who knows. We are looking back at the doctor menu, and hoping for someone wonderful. We need to get on a treatment plan, and that has been on hold until we get into Johns Hopkins. I am still doing long, full body Reiki treatments on Tim, and am cooking all the things that are supposed to be healing for cancer recovery. Last night he got his first colonic flush — we have heard this is helpful to get rid of toxins. There will be at least a series of three. My cousin, Brent, emailed today to say the fresh graviola leaves are on their way from Brazil. We have also read that paw paw is supposed to contain some of the same active compounds, and grows in the USA. I will look into this further. The compounds in both graviola and paw paw are supposed to attack rapidly-growing cells in the body (the cancer ones, of course). For this reason, pregnant woman should not ingest these things. It sounds hopeful. I do know that Tim finds the Reiki very soothing. In case you don’t know how this works, it is a hands-on oriental healing technique that I have been trained to do. The person giving Reiki is a channel for healing energy, and the hands get very hot. I get very flushed in general, when I am doing a treatment, particularly in areas that need healing.
It is peculiar, but I have become Ms. Housewife since this cancer verdict. I have been getting up at five in the morning, making Tim hot cereal and twig tea, setting out his lunch, and doing prep for dinner. The dishes are always done, the counters clean, and the refrigerator purged of “mystery containers”. I might even start doing his ironing. I pick up occasional dirty dishes beside the television without feeling aggrieved. He isn’t even feeling sick at this point — he is running a marathon this weekend with our daughter. I wonder if this has happened with other people — the urge to become a caregiver, even when it is not really necessary.
This week I have been more efficient with my meal planning and cooking. I am finding that Silken Tofu can whiz up into a variety of sauces. Falafels are a fast and delicious meal, with a tofu sauce. Last night I made a chopped broccoli sauce, thickened with unsweetened soy milk and cornstarch. It was served over some rice noodles, but Tim doesn’t really like the “bouncy” quality of rice pasta. Maybe just the thicker pastas will be bouncy. He would rather have sauces over plain brown rice. I remember my mom making creamed asparagus and creamed peas over toast, and that can be done with some of these sauces, too. Now that I have discovered there is fresh watercress in one of our springs, I am keeping that in the refrigerator. Maybe it is a little too “hot” for macrobiotic cooking, though, but haven’t read anything to indicate I should not use it. I know it is nutritious. I have learned that herbs and spices are very limited in macrobiotic cooking, but not sure yet exactly why. We are trying to sort out the philosophical aspects of macrobiotic lifestyle from the actual health considerations of the food, itself. One might suggest that it is a holistic system — that the philosophical and nutrition are linked — and that may be so, but I need to be convinced of the whole package. We like things to taste good, and enjoying food is important, too.
My darn bread sponge is not bubbling any more, and I am not sure what is up with that. I have looked on line to figure out why the sponge that was once springy and bubbly got thin and non-bubbly. I tried putting some pineapple juice in to aid fermentation, but no luck. I found a helpful site on line, and the man who runs it said he will send me some of his starter, with instructions on how to make it grow.
This weekend is my chaplaincy class in New York. It has been immeasurably helpful for my mental and spiritual health, particularly now. Tim and Emily are headed to run a marathon in Californina this weekend. It was planned long before we learned Tim has cancer, and he wanted to go forward with their original plans. They don’t plan to race it, but instead to take their time and enjoy talking while they run. Eating will be a challenge for Tim while he is away, but he will take some food along. Also — this will be California, where there are probably a lot of macrobiotic and organic food eaters!
Blessings
